Kyle Osborne's EntertainmentOrDie.Com

Movie Review: ‘Planes’ Not A Good “Vehicle” for Disney

By Kyle Osborne

Some are calling “Planes,” Disney’s new animated feature, “Cars 3.” Fair enough, it is a “retread” (sorry) of those talking car flicks, only this time with wings.  Sadly, this worn out template of a film doesn’t have the prestige and quality of the Pixar films (even though John Lasseter, former Pixar honcho, serves as Executive Producer). The film which was once headed for the direct to video market makes a stop for a quick cash grab before, inevitably, falling into the bin of Disney “Lessers.”

Dane Cook provides the voice of “Dusty Crophopper,” a little single engine guy who flies low and slow somewhere over the Heartland’s crops. He’s got plenty of speed and ambition, but just one problem: he’s afraid of heights.

With two fart jokes in the first ten minutes, and a sluggish start—“Planes” will be a tough sit for the very young and the adult audience. Kids from 5 to 9 might enjoy a 3-D glimpse of their soon-to-be Happy Meal toys, but the worn out story of the “Little Engine That Could” bogs down in its own inevitability.

And so you don’t think I am the Grinch who stole Disney, let me say that there are some bits of breathtaking animation. The point-of-view shots from the cockpit will almost give you air sickness with the twists and turns and dives—it’s very impressive. And the storyline of an around the world race gives the animators the chance to take us on aerial tours of Europe, India, Nepal, China and Mexico.  The scenery is as gorgeous as the storyline is pedantic. And the low-hanging ethnic stereotypes will be potentially offensive to some.

The movie “Turbo,” which may still be in a few theaters has everything “Planes” doesn’t—a wicked sense of humor and characters who you really care about. It’s a shame that “Turbo” has essentially bombed, while “Planes” will take off at the box office.

Sometimes branding is all it takes. But “Planes” isn’t worthy of the brand.

2 Stars out of 4.

Rated PG

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